Comestibles

Comestible (n): food —usually used in plural

So, why not just say "food"? For starters, "food" is such a mundane word. Comestible can also mean "edible" - a two-for-one word, where "food" is just food. On the other hand, using comestibles in a sentence can sound highly snooty. It's like you're trying to be British a hundred years ago. How does one convince others that the use of big words stems from a genuine love of language and not pretension? Well, using "one" as a pronoun is probably a GREAT start...

Comestible is the word of the day because of Jerk Punch Night. My friend J is cooking dinner (jerk chicken and rum punch, hence the title) for The Group. He is a great cook, so I'm EXCITED. And starving. I'm doing a new calorie-counting diet program, and I can only eat 1,612 calories a day. I had to save up a lot for tonight, so I had a small breakfast and lunch. I also went to the gym. I didn't just have excellent intentions; I actually got off my ass and got dressed and went to the gym and burned 300 calories on the elliptical machine! Wooooo!!!

I adore comestibles, but being a gourmand (today's alternate word) is not conducive to weight loss. At least I've saved up enough calories for tonight - YUM!